Linda was killed by Elmo Blatch. Andy was wrongfully convicted for killing Linda and went to jail. He managed to escape prison, withdraw the warden’s corruption money from the bank and now is living a peacefully life in Zihuatanejo with Red.
There you go, now please let the poor Bushes have their dinner.
There are so many small jokes with his method. The fact he takes so long to dance around your assumptions and how he can let your mind play with the implications during silence is a skill that’s so well executed, it’s superb.
The thing I love about Mitch Hedberg’s comedy is that his jokes have layers that he peels back as he goes along. What starts out as a smirk-worthy joke “yeah, but what happened to the Drufresnes?” slowly builds as he adds to it with a little story about them being kidnapped in a trunk AND also hungry because they missed their reservation. Genius.
“I read that MTV got 40,000 applications for the casting of that show The Real World. That’s crazy. Just a perfectly round number like that. You’d think it would be like 40,008.”
The other day I helped a friend stay put. It’s a lot easier than helping someone move, I just went over to his house and made sure he didn’t load any shit in to a truck.
I get the Reese’s candy bar, If you read it, there’s an apostrophe. The candy bar is his. I didn’t know that. Next time your eating a Reese’s and some guy named Reese comes up to you and says let me have that. You better give it to him. I’m sorry Reece, I didn’t think I would ever run into you.
“I hate turkeys…If you stand in the meat section at the grocery store long enough, you start to get pissed off at turkeys…There’s turkey ham, turkey bologna, turkey pastrami. Some one needs to tell the turkey, ‘maaan, just be yourself! I already like you little brotha, you do not need to emulate the other animals! You got your own thing goin! I used to draw you *holds out hand*” – Mitch Hedberg
“Once I saw a duck walking down the street so I went into Subway and ordered two pieces of bread, and they informed me that they could not do that, like there was some speical rule at Subway that two pieces of bread weren’t allowed to touch. So the woman asked me what I wanted on the sandwich and I said I do not care, it is for a duck, and she was like oh then it’s free. I was not aware that ducks eat for free at Subway. It’s like give me a chicken fajita sub, but don’t worry about ringing it up, it is for a duck.”
Mitch Hedberg
RIP
Linda was killed by Elmo Blatch. Andy was wrongfully convicted for killing Linda and went to jail. He managed to escape prison, withdraw the warden’s corruption money from the bank and now is living a peacefully life in Zihuatanejo with Red.
There you go, now please let the poor Bushes have their dinner.
I love that silly Mitch.
People are missing! Who can eat at a time like this?
RIP good comedian
I used to like Mitch Hedberg, I still do, but I used to, too
Viva los Mitch!
There are so many small jokes with his method. The fact he takes so long to dance around your assumptions and how he can let your mind play with the implications during silence is a skill that’s so well executed, it’s superb.
Thank you for correctly spelling this fictitious family’s name. It was bugging me in that thread a few days ago.
“I don’t have a girlfriend but I do know a girl who would be really mad if she heard me say that”
Miss ya mitch
[RIP Mitch. You were one of the good ones.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jUyommeD0_8)
Escalators are never out of service, just temporarily stairs.
Love this guy
The thing I love about Mitch Hedberg’s comedy is that his jokes have layers that he peels back as he goes along. What starts out as a smirk-worthy joke “yeah, but what happened to the Drufresnes?” slowly builds as he adds to it with a little story about them being kidnapped in a trunk AND also hungry because they missed their reservation. Genius.
I’ll never be over his death.
Used to love watching him and cracking one liners with my buddy. Remembering the bit about the frozen banana just made me laugh
Love Mitch. Sprite is not just a lemon and a lime.
Rice is great when you want to eat 2000 of something.
I think about this EVERY TIME I’m at a restaurant calling out names for tables.
Go! Around! I cannot open the wall!
Rip Mitch you were a legend mate. You still are a legend, but you were a legend too.
Mitch was so beyond his time! Just a absolute mastermind with his writing
He looks so young and healthy here
Mitch is one of my all-time favorites. I can hear the same joke I’ve heard 100 times, 20 years later and still find it hilarious.
“I did not lose a leg in Viet Nam to serve hotdogs to teenagers!”
“but you have both your legs?”
“Like I said…… I did not lose a leg in Viet Nam….”
“Tried acid once, I discovered butter is better than margarine……. I saw through the bullshit.”
“I read that MTV got 40,000 applications for the casting of that show The Real World. That’s crazy. Just a perfectly round number like that. You’d think it would be like 40,008.”
A burrito is just a sleeping bag for ground beef.
The other day I helped a friend stay put. It’s a lot easier than helping someone move, I just went over to his house and made sure he didn’t load any shit in to a truck.
“A severed foot is the ultimate stocking stuffer. “
“ I never got good at golf; I never got a hole In one….But I did hit a guy and that’s way more satisfying.”
Absolute comedy legend.
#Oh man , here comes that *frog*
I miss him! I wish he was saved by the buoyancy of citrus.
Mitch would have cranked out some amazing material over the past decade
“Rice is perfect for when you are hungry and want a thousand of something”
Always clever.
If you want to talk to me after the show, I’ll be…. Fucking surprised.
“It would suck to be killed by a bow and arrow” “Look at this dead guy, let’s go this way.”
Whelp. Time go to on youtube and watch all of Mitch’s’ stuff.
I used to miss Mitch, I still do, but I used to too.
I get the Reese’s candy bar, If you read it, there’s an apostrophe. The candy bar is his. I didn’t know that. Next time your eating a Reese’s and some guy named Reese comes up to you and says let me have that. You better give it to him. I’m sorry Reece, I didn’t think I would ever run into you.
“Every time someone hands me a flier, it is like they are saying ‘Here, you throw this away.’”
“I hate turkeys…If you stand in the meat section at the grocery store long enough, you start to get pissed off at turkeys…There’s turkey ham, turkey bologna, turkey pastrami. Some one needs to tell the turkey, ‘maaan, just be yourself! I already like you little brotha, you do not need to emulate the other animals! You got your own thing goin! I used to draw you *holds out hand*” – Mitch Hedberg
“Once I saw a duck walking down the street so I went into Subway and ordered two pieces of bread, and they informed me that they could not do that, like there was some speical rule at Subway that two pieces of bread weren’t allowed to touch. So the woman asked me what I wanted on the sandwich and I said I do not care, it is for a duck, and she was like oh then it’s free. I was not aware that ducks eat for free at Subway. It’s like give me a chicken fajita sub, but don’t worry about ringing it up, it is for a duck.”