Oh no. I do hold people to those standards. People say thay others don’t judge you on the little stuff, but then they call out a guy who took a turn too sharply in their car.
People are very judgemental, they just don’t judge you to your face.
My son is 13 and this is 100% him. It makes me insane. Nothing I’ve tried has helped him. We have him in therapy now to try and fix his negative self talk. He is a brilliant, well-balanced, and well-liked kid, seeing him think poorly of himself breaks me heart.
Mom: “Your best will always be good enough.”
Me: *makes best effort*
Mom: “It’s not good enough.”
Me: “I did my best.”
Mom: “No, you did not. If you had done your best, it would have been good enough.”
Repeat for eighteen years.
This taught me that compassion is for people who did their best. This also taught me that failure is a sign that I did not do my best. I can see when others are trying and failing. But for me, I’m not trying hard enough. Thus, I do not deserve compassion.
Recognizing the problem is step one. I’m getting better, but it will take a while.
The only blessing of the divorce I’m going through is a major life perspective shift. I was that perfectionist who wasn’t kind to myself, ever. Even with that, I still got cheated on and taken advantage of. Now I don’t give a shit as much and it’s been nice seeing the world doesn’t fall apart.
After years of therapy I did find a kind of hit or miss way to show myself compassion. Bear with me here:
Do you talk to yourself? I mean of course you so, but when you do, out loud, or in your mind, do you ever imagine a listener of any kind? A viewer, audience, observer, etc.? Well if you do, that’s you! You’re your own audience.
With that in mind, I of course want to be nice to the audience! At the very least I see them as someone else. Someone worthy of compassion. If I can recognize that it’s just me, and has been the whole time, I can sometimes see myself like I would see someone else, and I’m proud of them.
Yes, the blue dino deserves no mercy, compassion, or any good thing in life. Because they are a failure. All other living creatures except for the blue dino and additionally myself are deserving of these benefits.
I just finished reading East of Eden by John Steinbeck and there was one part towards the end that really resonated with me. The message was basically this: If you always need to be perfect, you’ll always end up seeing yourself as bad because you cant live up to impossible standards. Once you realize that you don’t need to be perfect, it leaves room for you to be good enough.
The book is on its way! Sign up to the [email list](https://mailchi.mp/534ae7e523ea/untitled-page) to be the first to know when it’s out!
This goes really poorly in hand with thinking I’m awesome at everything
I feel this in the void of space where my soul used to sleep.
I treat others the way I want to be treated… I treat myself the way others treat me…
As far as I can tell, most people are the exact opposite.
I’d never treat someone as poorly as I treat myself 😬
I feel so seen… and it’s terrible.
Why is this me. What does this mean? Am I a dinosaur?
This image speaks to me and indont like what its saying.
Anxiety + ADHD means my inner voice is really mean. But at least I treat everyone with compassion! … right? That makes it better?
Okay, someone recorded my discord conversation 3 days ago. Who are you, to spy on me and mah friends, ye bastard?!
Jk, but it’s exactly how it went that time.
I don’t know why but I always assume the worst in myself. I don’t remember the last time i had self confidence.
This one* hits way too close to home.
Now I know why they went extinct
Oh no. I do hold people to those standards. People say thay others don’t judge you on the little stuff, but then they call out a guy who took a turn too sharply in their car.
People are very judgemental, they just don’t judge you to your face.
Is this mindset related to ADHD? Just asking because of the name of the strip…
Why is this in r/funny? What’s next? Buddy Gator?
My son is 13 and this is 100% him. It makes me insane. Nothing I’ve tried has helped him. We have him in therapy now to try and fix his negative self talk. He is a brilliant, well-balanced, and well-liked kid, seeing him think poorly of himself breaks me heart.
Damn the stress induced adrenaline comic hit me hard but this? This is a whole other hit to my soul
The cycle (for me) looked something like this:
Mom: “Your best will always be good enough.”
Me: *makes best effort*
Mom: “It’s not good enough.”
Me: “I did my best.”
Mom: “No, you did not. If you had done your best, it would have been good enough.”
Repeat for eighteen years.
This taught me that compassion is for people who did their best. This also taught me that failure is a sign that I did not do my best. I can see when others are trying and failing. But for me, I’m not trying hard enough. Thus, I do not deserve compassion.
Recognizing the problem is step one. I’m getting better, but it will take a while.
Rejection sensetive dysphoria
Is this actually a sign of ADHD?
The only blessing of the divorce I’m going through is a major life perspective shift. I was that perfectionist who wasn’t kind to myself, ever. Even with that, I still got cheated on and taken advantage of. Now I don’t give a shit as much and it’s been nice seeing the world doesn’t fall apart.
Who stole a convo from me and my therapist?
I can’t justify my existence and the resources I consume by being alive.
Is this that bottom-weighted font they specifically made for people with dyslexia?
After years of therapy I did find a kind of hit or miss way to show myself compassion. Bear with me here:
Do you talk to yourself? I mean of course you so, but when you do, out loud, or in your mind, do you ever imagine a listener of any kind? A viewer, audience, observer, etc.? Well if you do, that’s you! You’re your own audience.
With that in mind, I of course want to be nice to the audience! At the very least I see them as someone else. Someone worthy of compassion. If I can recognize that it’s just me, and has been the whole time, I can sometimes see myself like I would see someone else, and I’m proud of them.
Just wanted to share. Hope it helps.
Yes, the blue dino deserves no mercy, compassion, or any good thing in life. Because they are a failure. All other living creatures except for the blue dino and additionally myself are deserving of these benefits.
I just finished reading East of Eden by John Steinbeck and there was one part towards the end that really resonated with me. The message was basically this: If you always need to be perfect, you’ll always end up seeing yourself as bad because you cant live up to impossible standards. Once you realize that you don’t need to be perfect, it leaves room for you to be good enough.
I think people are more often too critical of others and overlook their own mistakes.
You didnt hit close to home you straight up shot me.